Ocean Dreamer

Choices have been on my mind a lot lately. Front and center in my mind right now is the choice of sperm donor. Now that I’ve chosen my sperm bank, its time to choose a donor. When my ex and I were together and thinking about having a kiddo, the choice was easier: since I was going to be the pregnant one, we wanted a donor that looked like her. Now that its just me, there are many more choices available. I do want a donor who looks like me, but the options are still almost endless. My family, while all white, runs the gamut from blond-hair-blue-eyes-and-very-fair (my sister’s hair was so blond when she was born that you could see her scalp until she was two) to dark-hair-and-more-olive-skin. So in terms of physical appearance, I could choose any in that range and still have a child that resembled my family.

And then there is the whole concept of choosing half my child’s genetic ancestry from a ten-page form. It is a very surreal experience. What can you really tell about a person from the information he’s written? Yes, I know these men’s health histories (and those of their parents, grandparents, siblings, and various other relations), but can I tell if I would like them as people? Are they honest, compassionate, social-justice-oriented? Do they read and know something about the world around them? I find I learn more about their personalities by looking at their handwriting styles than by looking at their actual answers.

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